“I’m not trying to sleep with you.”
My good bud and I were having a conversation the other day about the young lady he’d spent time with the night before.
They were hanging out until the early morning hours. He lives in Manhattan. She lives in some faraway section of Brooklyn. They were blocks away from his apartment. Noting the time, he suggested that she stay with him instead of going back to Brooklyn.
Her: “But we’ve only gone out once or twice and I don’t want to sleep with you this soon.”
Him: “I’m not trying to sleep with you. It’s 5 a.m. and you live in Brooklyn. Just stay with me.”
He was lying when he said “I’m not trying to sleep with you.” Almost every man has lied about this and almost every woman has heard him lie about it.
The thing is, though, that he kind of meant what he said even though he lied. He was trying to sleep with her generally, but he was not necessarily expecting to sleep with her that night. He was genuinely offering his place without the expectation of sex (although he would if she wanted to). I suggested that the more accurate statement would be “I am trying to sleep with you, but its okay if you don’t want to right now.”
Except, for some reason it feels like it’s against the rules to tell a woman that you’re trying to sleep with that you’re trying to sleep with her, even though both parties are likely well aware of the fact. That seems stupid to me, so I think that going forward in my single life I’m going to do away with “I’m not trying to sleep with you” in favor of “I am trying to sleep with you, but its ok if you don’t want to right now.”
So he lied with the best intentions, she probably knew he was lying but also that he was a good guy, so she went home with him. And then they had sex.
THE END.
